I haven't forgotten to blog, I swear.

Things have just been really busy/stressful since Jaden's arrival.  I'm getting used to having a little one around, but it is a big adjustment.  Everyday I swear he gets bigger.  And everyday I swear I get a little more tired. 

Things have been...hard...lately.  I find myself being angry at Greg a lot.  There's no reason for my anger but I can't help it.  I know he has to work, but he doesn't realize that my job doesn't have an 8 hour day.  Even when I think I'm done, I keep going.  Maybe I resent him for being able to sleep while I have to watch Jaden's chest go up and down.  Maybe I worry that somehow I don't measure up.

Maybe I need to talk to my OB on Monday about possible PPD.

...Maybe what I thought I could avoid, is unavoidable.

Although I am 2 weeks out from having him, I'm still having a rough recovery.  When they removed my staples my incision opened up.  I now have to go back twice a week to make sure it doesn't get infected.  Everyday I have to deal with the nerve pain that's associated with a c-section.  And although it's not as bad as it once was, it still hurts.  And the weird "fluid pouch" that happened following my surgery is still there and showing no signs of going away.

I don't want to say that my birthing experience wasn't pleasant, but the recovery is hell.

*Speaking of me being angry...I just had to yell at Greg because apparently, I can't have 10 minutes to update my blog.  No, I have to talk to him constantly...plus ward off his advances...soothe our son (since he's a "momma's boy")...and make about a million decisions about our life.*

Jaden is doing extremely well.  He's breastfeeding and is a pro at it.  We had some ups and downs but he knows what he's doing.  He eats alot though.  I swear he's about 12 lbs so far, and can no longer fit into a size 0-3month pant.  His little legs are so long!  He's a pretty happy kid.  He doesn't really fuss or anything.  And he sleeps pretty good too.  If only he would sleep in his crib though...that would be awesome. 

Here's some pictures:

 

Until Next Time:
~MommyToBee

Tick. Tock.

Sorry it's been a while since posted.  We didn't have the internet...damn FIL.  Anyway, it's now all set up...and if FIL knows what's good for him, he won't "forget" to pay again.  He saw the wrath of a very hormonal pregnant woman...I don't think he's going to risk it again.

Well.  Not a lot has changed since the last time I posted.  At my last appointment, I was still not dilated and my cervix was still real high.  Absolutely zero change since my 38th week appointment.  I would love to say that it doesn't bother me, but it does.  Especially since I've been having some painful contractions and nothing is happening.  It discouraging.  But we still have three days until my due date...and anything could happen.  However, at my next appointment (on my due date) we will be discussing induction.  They are starting to worry about my blood pressure.  It has been slowly going up...and they want to make sure that I don't develop bigger problems down the road.

Basically...even the Doctor doesn't want me to go the extra 10 days after my due date.  She feels that he is more than ready to come out, but he needs a little nudge.  

And that's why I'm praying that she is the one to deliver Boo.

Again, all the people around me are nuts.  My mother actually called Greg last night at 11:15 because he texted her.  It's a long story...but the short of it...she thought I was in labor.  Oy.  He's trying to talk to her softly because I was in a lot of pain and had some trouble sleeping.  Well, when I asked him who was on the phone and he told me I pretty much freaked.  And it continued into this morning when she told me she actually believes that we won't tell her when I go into labor.  If she keeps up this nonsense, I won't tell her.  Even though she is "going to know before *I* go into labor".  Obviously she knows my body more than I do. 

And then I get the texts saying "Oh...you should do *blank* to go into labor."  Most of them has been a been there, tried that.  I appreciate most of the suggestions and I welcome them from most people.  However... don't tell me that Greg and I are not having sex the right way because I still haven't gone into labor.  Seriously?  I think if he is able to get me pregnant twice, he knows what he's doing.   

Truth be told, I hope I do get induced now.  And I hope it's during the week.  I want my best friend to be able to come see her Godson.  I want to tell people when to come.  I want to have that final date.  I want to see the light at the end of the tunnel.  Right now, I just feel like I'm going to be pregnant forever.

A few pictures from last week:

38 weeks, 5 days.  Our last night out before baby.  I love that man with all of my heart.  Even if he's a dumb dumb most days. :P

Until Next Time:
~MommyToBee

Picture Tuesday...I finally remembered.

Alright.  My mother has been bugging me for bump and nursery pictures.  Luckily I took a picture when I was 8 months and I took some this morning.  No more do I want to stand in front of something and have my picture taken.  It reminds me of how huge I really am.  But, I guess it is a good reference point.  She told me I looked beautiful. :(  I still think she was lying.

This is at 8 months.  It might look a little weird since I was sitting down.


This might sound a little nuts...but sometimes I'm still surprised I'm pregnant.  I can't explain it, but it baffles my mind.









Please excuse my dirty mirror. 



He's really sticking out now.  37 weeks.  You think I would be used to an ever expanding belly.  It still baffles my mind.  I'm just anxious to have him and to lose the weight.  I know it's for a good reason that I blew up like a balloon, I just want to be semi-normal again.

I'm too swollen.  I miss my feet.  And my belly is lopsided because of how he lays.

Okay...I'm done complaining. :)



Now...the nursery!  It's still not done, but it's getting there.  And it'll be done this weekend!  (Hopefully we can afford my glider.  If not, I'll probably cry.)

His laundry.  Trust me...there was more than what you think there was.  That's THREE baskets FULL of clothing, sheets, blankets and other little things.  I thought I would never get it done.

It took 5 loads of laundry and me about 4 times folding each item.  Yea...I'm that psycho.

Crib!  I loves it.

"Dressing" table.  This is actually a changing table...the top "shelf" folds towards you to give you room to change the diaper.  However, I like using it like this more.  I'll change him in his crib, or the floor.  I feel that I'm using the space better this way.

Here is the biggest pain in the neck baby item I had to put together.  It took me almost an hour to figure out how to set up this stroller.  (Sorry the picture is so dark.)  My only hope is that Greg has an equally hard time getting the car seat installed.  Seriously...that damn stroller took forever. 







I'm pretty set.  All I need is baby. :) 

Until Next Time:
~MommyToBee

What a weekend!

It was an amazing weekend this past weekend.  I had an awesome baby shower courtsey of my best friend, Jenn!  I will talk more about it tomorrow...but here are some pictures. :D

Until Next Tme:
~MommyToBee

Welcome Summer!

I have come to the realization that it's offically summer and I will melt.  I'm always hot.  Always sweaty.  And the newest craving is anything ice cream related.  (Milkshakes, frozen yogurt, Rita's custard, DQ blizzards, ice cream cakes...the list could really go on and on.)  But what can you do?  Summer is always hot.  It's just going to be a little hotter this year.

Instead of actually doing anything productive, I made a to do list.  So far:  I've gotten nothing done.  But at least I sort of have a plan.  And luckily, I might not need a lot of help with Greg.  Well...he still needs to help, but at least I can pin point exactly what needs done.

This week is super busy.  I have a lot to get done before we leave for home on Friday.  Let's see:  Boo's room needs redone, cleaning, sorting out things that I'm going to sell on craigslist, taking pictures of said items, our first birthing class *Whooo!*, and probably about another million things.

...And the list just keeps getting longer...HA!

But through it all, I'm getting excited for my shower this weekend!  I've never really had a party for "me" since I was a child...depsite a sweet sixteen that was mostly for my stepdad because I had no say.  I'm so grateful that I have a wonderful best friend who wanted to throw me a shower.  And she is truly making this fiesta all about the baby.  I really am blessed to have amazing people in my life. 

It's Tuesday...and that means I have pictures.  Warning...they look terrible because Greg doesn't know how to use a camera. :)

HAHA....you can't see where my belly ends and where the wall starts!  :(  I'm huge.  Ohhhhh well.  (And that's my shower dress behind me.  I can't wait to wear it. :D)

Okay.  This picture makes me REALLY sad.  Again with all the shadows and it's hard to see the belly..and my butt looks huge.  But also, my face isn't that chubby.  My arms might be that big, I can't really tell..but my face isn't that big.  I swear.  And if it is, I refuse to believe it.

*Shakes head*










Until Next Time:
~MommyToBee

Grow up. *rant* `

Well.  As some of you may or may not know, Greg's older brother-Billy- was released from jail on Monday.  And although it's a very jouous occassion, it seems like all the boys in Greg's family has reverted to age 2.  And unfortunately, Greg isn't immune to this growing epidemic.  It's a problem, but I know it's going to eventually going to calm down.  (At least, that's what I tell myself.)  I realize that everyone is just happy that he is out and that as long as he doesn't mess up in the next five years, he'll have a clean record.  However, I'm not enjoying all of this childish behavior. 

Last night, I almost came to blows with Greg's other brother (and perhaps the biggest child of them all) Shawn.  He always has something smart to say.  I wasn't in the best of moods yesterday and he just pushed all my buttons.  Greg actually had to get in between us at the resturant (last night was wing night).  I wasn't happy with his stupid little comments or the fact that he acts like such a child.  Of course, all the "boys" fed off of his immature behavior.
By the end of the night (when we got home) everyone (including Kevin and Josh-Greg's nephews) were covered in flour.  And although Greg didn't start it, he didn't stay out of it either.  Ughhhhhhhhh.  I really wish that I didn't have to babysit my 29 year old fiancee. 

Not only is Greg's family getting on my nerves...but also my family too.  Apparently last week my mom and my grandpa got into it over a real non-exsistant issue.  They aren't talking, and I'm sorry...it shouldn't have gotten to the point where it was.  I'm sure no one is innocent in the whole matter.  It all seems so silly.

Before Shawn and I got into our little spat, I recieve a call from my grandma.  She told me that she didn't get me a mattress.  Which, shouldn't be such a big deal.  She went on to tell me that she got me something that I would get more use out of.  I told her not to tell me, because I still want to be mostly suprised with my gifts at the shower.  Through my entire meal I tried to figure out what she could have gotten me.  After dinner, my mom calls and informs me that she got me a pack-n-play.  *Sigh*.  I already have THREE pack-n-plays.  I'm very grateful that she got me something very nice.  Although, at the same time I'm saying to myself: "She already knew I had one.  And now I'm going to have to buy a mattress."  (An expense that could have been avoided a long time ago.  When they were on sale.  A week after she promised to get us one.)

Maybe I'm just being overly dramatic.  Maybe my hormones are getting to me.  Maybe I should just let it go.  And Lord knows I'm trying not to get all "uppity" lately.  Just seems like things aren't going as smoothly as it once seemed like it was.

I just cannot fathom that time is going so fast.  My shower is less than two weeks away.  My due date is 75 days away.  And although August 30th seems like a lifetime away...it's coming up quick!  (Side note rant...my mother had the gull to tell me that I should either go early or have Boo on the weekend because if not, the kids will be in school.  Well Golly Gee...if I go into labor on a Wednesday I guess I'll keep my legs closed.  Sorry, but she's had three kids, she knows that you cannot calculate when the baby comes.) 

*Ahem.*  I guess I should just let things go.  Maybe I'm more of a control freak than what I thought I was. 

Here's a few pictures from the past few weeks.  Notice the ever expanding belly.

26 Weeks and 2 days! 

28 weeks.  I forgot to take a pic at 27 weeks...oops!

29 weeks!  I can't believe how far I am already.  Jeez.

Until Next Time:
~MommyToBee

Picture Tuesday. *Pic Heavy*

I kind of feel bad that I didn't take pictures while we were on "vacation".  It just didn't seem right, and I didn't want to post anything on facebook saying that we were broke and things were kind of up in the air.  The people I wanted to know knew and that was it.  So we didn't take pictures for my 23rd or 24th week.  But I'm back this week with my 25th week pictures!  YAY! 

I've accepted the fact that I look a lot further than what I am.  And the fact that I look huge 24/7.  The only thing that I really don't like is the fact that I'm starting to just put on weight everywhere.  I noticed especially in my thighs that I'm gaining weight.  And the fact that my ring no longer fits still bums me out.  Although I can wear my "back up" ring, it's not the same. 

The nurse that I absolutely love at my doctor's office told me about a women they treated last year.  She lost a baby at 15 weeks.  And 6 weeks after she lost that child, she was pregnant again.  Now, she got pregnant a lot faster than me, but she put on a lot of water weight.  She went from about 110lbs to 230 in her pregnancy.  Yes, that's a lot of weight, and no I'm not expecting to put on 120lbs.  However, the nurse explained to me, that although I'm gaining weight, there is a small possibility that it's mostly water.  She agreed that I might have put on a little fat, but it might be water.  I don't know if it's true or not, but it's a little glimmer of hope that I'm not just an elephant.

Although I am positive that I will lose weight after the pregnancy, I'm more concerned about possible problems while I'm still pregnant.  I'm deathly afraid of gestational diabetes and preeclampsia.  And every time that little man doesn't move for more than a period of 45 minutes I start to worry.  I know my weight is a big issue on me and him.  All I can do is continue to eat as healthy as I can and avoid stress as much as possible.  I've been working out more and more.  But lately it's been really hard.  I don't know if it's because the third trimester is starting to knock on the door or not, but I'm always exhausted.  I've definitely started nesting and thinking I need to make sure everything is ready for him like yesterday.  We haven't touched the nursery since we set up the carpet and crib. 

I just look at the calendar and say...15 more weeks or so...it doesn't seem like enough time.

I know time is going so fast, but it can't go fast enough.  I can't wait to meet my little man.  He's becoming more and more active every day and to me, there's nothing that can replace that little "bump bump bump" feeling.  The other day after not being active for about 3 days straight, I really started to panic.  I didn't want to worry though, because maybe he was just in a weird spot.  So I laid down and was watching a show about Will Smith.  (Side note...he's so MMMMM) They were talking about his oldest son, Jayden.  I said to myself out loud: "I like the name Jayden Alexander."  You would think I just gave Boo a tablespoon full of sugar.  He went nuts.  Started kicking and punching and flipping around...and it was throughout my entire belly.  After about 10 minutes *yes, he was going nuts for 10 minutes straight* he finally calmed down.  Well, I said the name out loud again.  This time I got the same response but for not nearly as long.  When I told Greg this, of course he had to feel for himself.  Sure enough, hours later, the same thing happened.

Did our son agree to a name?  I don't want to keep calling him the name (although if I say it, he will respond) just in case we don't name him Jayden after all.  I don't want to confuse the little man.  But I do think we found a new number 1 favorite.

Now, Greg and I were planning on getting maternity pictures done.  Nothing fancy, just a little package at Wal-mart.  But since money is low, we're no longer doing them.  But I must say, this is my favorite picture so far.  I don't need anything fancy.  I just need my digital and my hubby and my big ol' belly.

Greg was definitely being very cute last night.  He really is getting excited about the arrival.  I think he's getting really nervous too.  With every day that passes he seems to realize that we're a day closer to "D-Day".  I even caught him watching a baby show the other day.  Although I personally can't watch a live birth, he can.  (I see no point in me watching one, because I'm not going to be able to see over my belly when he comes out.  And I'm already scared so I don't want to freak myself out.)  He kids about being at the bar while I'm pushing the baby out, but I know that he's going to be right next to me probably bawling more than anyone else.


Until Next Time:
~MommyToBee

Good Grief...I'm "Popping"!

On Saturday when we went to the flea market we stopped at a vendor for some *delicious* chicken.  He looked at me and when "So...when are you popping?"  It kinda caught me off guard...since I never had a stranger come up to me and ask that.  But it was also good...sicne now I know I "offically" look more pregnant than fat.  His mother walks up and says:  "Oh...that's a HEALTHY baby."  I resisted giving her a dirty look, but she chimed in:  "I mean, you are carrying well...that means it's a healthy baby."  Even she realized how a crazy hormonal pregnant women could take that sentence.  I like her.

When we went home Greg's mom even pointed out that I look, in fact, that I suddenly "popped" out.  Which, if you asked me, I think I "popped" out a little earlier...but I guess it's just more noticeable now.

So, 22 weeks...this is what I look like!

(Okay, so apparently my pictures don't like me and the decided to show up really small...this is the "x-large" setting.)

I know I have a dumb face, but I just got off the phone with my Mother...and I was still pretty heated and a little angry.  I look so HUGE.  It doesn't help that I'm offically hungry every second.  It's really hard to resist.  But I think I'm doing a good job.  It doesn't help that the medicines I'm taking also causes weight gain.  But I've been getting out more and moving around more, so hopefully that will help.

This is Greg's favorite picture.  I think because it's so natural?  I didn't even realize he took the picture until he told me to do it again on the other side.  I didn't even notice the flash going off.  What can I say?  I can't get enough of my belly.

You can't really see the stretch marks but you can definately see that although I bitch alot and I rant about everything...I'm enjoying myself and this pregnancy.  It's hard but I already know it's all worth it.  Now if only I could figure out a way to keep my ring permately on my finger instead of having to wear it on a chain around my neck.  It's really bumming me out.  I've had a ring on my finger since June 10th 2009 and I feel naked without it.  But it's getting harder and harder to put it on and take it off.  I just hope it's not a sign of my blood pressure rising. :( That would add insult to injury.

Until Next Time:
~MommyToBee

I really don't feel like cleaning today... (pics!)

This weekend Greg promised me that we are going to rearrange our room.  While I'm excited for a new set-up, (his ex made him move the furniture to where it is now) I know it's going to be a lot of work.  Mainly all week I got to pack up all "loose" things and put them in the nursery so it'll be easier to move things around.  To be quite honest, I'm really nervous anout all the things that have to be moved.  I'm still not fully moved in from when I moved from my old place to here.  It's sad to say that some of my stuff is still in boxes. 

When I first moved in there just seemed like there wasn't room for me.  Why?  Because he still had a whole bunch of stuff from his ex.  That's right!  And guess what...it's been 16 months since they were "offically" broken up and there's still some of her stuff here.  She got some of her stuff...but she left a lot of clothes.  I know that in the beginning it was hard for him to get her things out of there...since most of it he bought.  Buttttt c'mon...let's get it out of here!  I can't wait to have her out of our lives completely.  Everything about this women is terrible, I don't know how he put up with it for so long.

But I know that I need to pack up this stuff so we can move things around.  Really we need another person, because I can't move the heavy stuff.  And pretty much everything in our room is H-E-A-V-Y.  It's either solid wood or a big tv.  Not to mention we got to make sure that all the electronic stuff is pluged into the right places.  (This place has the worst electrical system I've ever seen.)  We're also going to clean everything  in the room.  Including the walls, molding, and I think we're even going to get new curtains/ blinds. 

...'Cause this baby is going to have a clean place to go. 

Well it's Tuesday!  That means pictures!  (Cause we all know that I love showing it off, even if I am a hippo)

I have no idea why lately my camera thinks I suddenly have a tan.  I'm not that dark.  I'm still as pale as an emo kid that's afraid of the sun.  Maybe I got to look and see what setting it's on...that might be it.
But here I am...21 weeks.  I haven't noticed any weight gain besides my butt (a little) and my belly.  My legs or my arms haven't gotten any fatter...just my belly.  Which is funny because when I go to a public place people just stare at me as if I ate a watermellon whole.  I know I've "popped" out a little...but I think it's really noticible that I'm pregnant and not just fat.

I think Greg was getting a little jealous of me getting camera time every week...so he had to pose for a few "belly pictures" too.  Truthfully...he looks more pregnant than me.  :(   I love how involved he's getting with the pregnancy.  Every day my belly gets 3 kisses.  When he wakes up, when he comes home from work and before bed.  I think actually seeing him move at the ultrasound really made him realize that he was going to be a daddy.  Oh and let me tell you, little man gets on my nerves just like his daddy.

Well Until Next Time:
~MommyToBee

If You Have Nothing Nice To Say... (Rant and Pictures)

*Rant Warning*  *Language Warning* *Extremely pissed off pregnant woman Warning*

...Don't say I didn't warn you.

As most of you might know, I saw my family this past weekend after we had our ultrasound.  Although most of my family was happy for me, and couldn't believe that I was pregnant..some showed some disrespect.  This particular person tried to act as nicely as they possibly could, but I could see the distain in their eyes.  I understand that I am unemployed college drop out that probably should be saving more money than I am right now.  I know that I shouldn't be buying myself new clothes because all of my older clothes no longer fit.  I'm not going to appologize for where I am in my life right now, because I am truly happy.  Please do not make remarks to me about my "whole life being on facebook" and the fact that I "don't call for the big things." 
...UMMMMMM what BIG things are going on in my life besides me being pregnant?  And you found out WAY before a lot of other family members.  So put that in your pipe and smoke it.  I'm sorry that you feel that I'm going nowhere in my life, that's your issue...not mine.  I'm LOVING my life right now.  I've got everything I need.  I have a man in my life that for the first time doesn't expect me to be something I'm not.  I have a child that's growing inside of me, after doctors told me that it just might not happen for me. 

You have two choices...be happy for me, or stay away.  I'm not going to pussyfoot around and walk on eggshells around you.  I am a grown woman, just like you.  Just because you are older, doesn't make you wiser.   You expect respect, well so do I.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Yes, Mrs. Doctor Ma'am...I put on weight.  It's not my fault that I'm on medicine that you PERSONALLY perscribed for me that makes me put on weight.  Apparently I can't stop taking this medicine because if I do, I won't be able to breathe!  I'm guessing air in my lungs is kinda important.  I know that I'm fat, and that I've gained "sufficent" amount of weight so far (22 pounds).  But don't assume that I'm just laying around eating bon-bons and potato chips.  Yes, I might not be the healthiest eater, but I'm fucking trying.  I've stuck to the diet that I was given at my first appointment.  I didn't know that now I should be eating an even more rescrited diet.  Now that I know, I'm going to try my best to stick to it as much as I can.
You're worried about my blood pressure.  Okay, I understand that.  But also read my chart.  What is my blood pressure?  It's on the low side of normal.  No, that's not a mistake...the nurse took my BP two times...both times it was the same thing.  So don't look at that and go "Well that has to be a mistake."  Not every fat person loves to cook in lard and add salt to everything they eat.  I'll admit I like potato chips, but I don't eat an entire bag at one sitting.  Don't lecture me on how I shouldn't be adding salt to my diet, when obviously, my blood pressure is good for now.  Instead, listen to me when I say that I'm concerned about GD, since that's a little more realistic at this point.  Although I finger prick myself often...I've been noticing it has been higher. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This one goes out to my friend Jenn, her husband and my fiancee.  This economy is in the shitter.  People are working at jobs that they hate, and applying to jobs that they normaly wouldn't consider.  At least Ben (Jenn's husband) and Greg are trying to provide for their family.  I think that is more mature than anything else.  Right now, Greg is working 12 hour shifts some days and working on the side doing pick up and mechanical work.  Although Ben doesn't have a job right now, he's trying.  I know he's not the most motivated person around...but at least he's putting himself out there.  He's not like some other people who are on unemployment for a year and only look for jobs because if he doesn't he'll lose his benefits.  He's also not on any sort of assistance...so in my book he's better than most. 

I know that before the baby comes that we'll have to go on food stamps and WIC...but that's because of formula.  I'm sorry but that shit's expenisve.  But so far, Greg has been more than able to support both me and him and the baby.  I know that is going to change in a few months...but he's busting his ass.

Don't act holier than thou because you don't know what to do with yourself.  I appaude these two men for trying to make their situations better. 
**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

Now that I'm done bitching, (thank you for listening reading by the way) it's time to post pictures:

20 Weeks!   Ahhh halfway there!  Yes, I look goofy and it's not the photographer's fault. :(  I'm really starting to "pop" out.  My belly is getting "harder" every day.  I'm still a little squishy (you'll see in the last picture) but I'm fine with that.  As long as the baby is growing and staying healthy.

I'm sorry that you can see my bra...this shirt isn't see thru as much as it looks...it's just super comfy.  Although I did gain 22 pounds so far, all the weight has been litterly in my belly and my boobs.  I went up 3 cup sizes so far! (I pretty much keep them squished in my bra...that I'm busting out of already)  And the doctor told me that I could go up another 3 sizes if I breast feed. 

Good Lord, that means I'll be in a...44 G!  Holy Boobs, Batman.  I hope she was kidding, because DAMN I'd be stacked.

Here you can see my "squishy".  I still have a good bit of fat rolls and my lower "hanging" belly is still there.  That's probably not going to go away.  I still miss my toes.  And although they are ugly, I still love my stretch marks.  My uterus was mesured for the first time yesterday, and little man is mesuring about 2 weeks ahead.  I hope that means that he's going to come a little earlier. :) 


Until Next Time:
~MommyToBee

Picture Tuesday!

I'm not going to post an actual post today.  Just for the simple fact that I'm too annoyed and frustrated with a certain family member.  And I don't feel like I should post when I don't know how I'm going to deal with this situation.  Buttttttt: that doesn't mean that I can't post my belly pictures!  (Ohhhh and fishing pictures too!)

So pretty.  So rocky.  Not a good place to fish.  Especially if you're in a chair and your fiancee doesn't tell you that you're about fall into when it breaks.


As if I didn't think I was a hippo already....

Jenn's Hubs.  I don't think he realized that I took this picture.

The only catch of the day was a 13 inch large mouth bass.  It was thrown back...but it wasn't caught by one of these two men....

It was Jenn!  Go cripple kid! 

Alright...belly pictures.   18 weeks.  We're almost halfway there.  Good grief.  Although, I love my belly.

I just wish I could see my feet.  And no, I'm not sticking my belly out...this is literally what I see when I look down.


My feet have gone missing.  There is a reward out if anyone can return them to me.

Sorry about the goofy face, but I must say, I even love my strech marks.  I can definately tell that I'm more baby then fat even though it might not come off that way 100% of the time.  I feel like I got a lot wider.  Which is something that I want to work on post-baby.  I've already started doing research for how to take off the pounds once the baby is done baking. 


I know it's a long shot...but I want to lose about 80lbs after the baby.  And yes, that number might go up depending on how much I put on already.  According to what I have written down, I put on 13lbs so far.  I'm sure it's way more than that.




That's all for today, until next time:
~MommyToBee

I Want Sleep!

Well, the past few nights again it's been hard to sleep.  Not because of the kicking in my stomach or the spring that just so happens to be under my butt no matter which way I lay; but it's because of my wonder finacee taking up the bed.  He was on top of me all night.  Or, he was laying on his back and sticking out every and any appendage on my side of the bed.  I woke up at 2:30, belly off the side of the bed and the rest of me was teetering on the edge.  I had a knee in my back, an elbow at the nape of my neck and a snoring man that was so loud that I swore he would wake the dead. 

Let's just say....I was not amused.  

Oh, let's tell your pregnant girlfriend was hogging the bed when she finally wakes up.  C'mon...don't be stooopid.  She will kill you. 

So.  I'm looing for a new mattress.  We have a queen (I think?) and I think it's time to get a king.  We do have enough room now, especially once I'm no longer pregnant.  But now it's getting ridiculous.  I'm trying not to take up the whole bed but instead Greg is being the bed hog.  I really can't take it anymore.  Most days I wake up feeling more tired then before I went to bed. 
The mattress we have is a good one.  It was my late handicapped aunt's bed (she was a double amputee) and she didn't have it a long time before she passed.  I used it for 18 months at my dad's and then it went unused for about the same time.  Then once I moved in with Greg we brought it into where we're living now.  We had it since August and it's been working well.  However...the springs are starting to come loose, there are two divits where him and I lay and it makes noise. (that might be the box spring)  I have no idea how it gotten this bad so quickly.  Maybe too much bouncing?  (LOL)  We do have a problem with just plopping on the bed.  And so did my aunt Bonnie.  So maybe it's just wear and tear? 

All I know is that I need a new mattress and I need one now.  Because if I wake up to an knee trying to go up my butt one more time...someone is going to wake up in a lot of pain...and it won't be me.

It's Tuesday!  And you know what that means!  Peeectures!

I know I'm blocking my "belly" but that's because the baby was kicking and I didn't want to miss it.  I feel like I'm always hungry lately and that's starting to bug me.  I try to eat as filling things as I can but it doesn't always happen.

To me, I don't see myself as "big".  I just see "baby".  Maybe it's just the camera angle?  I'm not sure.  But from the side...I don't feel big.  But in the longer distance pictures I'm h-u-g-e.

However, it's a whole 'nother story when I look down.  I've always had a belly.  But for the last few years I lost weight and I would see my boobs before my belly.  Well, that's all changed.  My belly just sticks out.  (sorry the picture isn't the best)  I like looking at it.  To me, it's cute. 


Well, that's all for now.  I'm going to try to sleep since I got the bed to myself.
Until Next Time,
~MommyToBee

Fortress of pillows.

Remember when you were really little and you would make a fort out of blankets, pillows, sofa cushions, and pretty much anything else that was nice and warm and fluffy?  Yea, I do that pretty much every morning with my massive amounts of pillows and blankets.  I can't help it.  My sleeping schedule somehow shifted after this whole crazy "spring forward" time change.  My bedtime (yes, bedtime) has been 8pm for a long time.  Now, I cannot get to sleep before 10pm.  Then waking up with Greg anytime between 3:30 and 6:00am...it's not much fun.  PLUS, the 3-8 times a night that I wake up to go to the bathroom?  Blehhhhh.  I know I need to get used to it, because the baby won't care if I'm exhausted or not.  But these are the last few months I have of "uninterrupted" sleep that I can get for up to a year and beyond.  I hate it that Greg can just sleep and sleep and sleep.  And yet, I'm the one who needs it most and I'm not getting enough.


It literally takes me hours to wake up in the morning.  Some days I can have a little pep in my step, but I really don't have that much get up and go anymore.  I want one night of just solid sleep.  Just because it's such a distant memory now. 


Okay, I'm done bitching now.


I love this spring time weather.  It's amazing.  I think Greg and I are going fishing on Saturday and following that we're going for a nice dinner.  It's the one thing that I'm buying for just him and I with income tax.  The rest of the money is going for the baby.  A little "nest egg" if you will.  Let's face it, I need out of this house.  If I have to go fishing to get out, I'm going to take it.  I'm tired of sitting in the house all day, usually feeling like crud, waiting for Gregory to come home.  I'm tired of doing laundry and cleaning.  Sometimes I wish Greg would help a little more...I know he does so much already....but I don't think I can do it all on my own. 


Now...about the doctor appointment we had on Tuesday.  I gained about 7 pounds!   *Yikes!*  I'm trying not to eat like a crazed women, but lately it's been hard.  Sometimes I'm just hungry.  And I like to eattttt.  But, they told me it was "okay".  We heard the hearbeat nice and strong.  145, baby.  There was no denying how clear it was.  The nurse that got the heartbeat the first time at 12 weeks told us that she never gets it at that time.  She then even told us that it's hard to get at 16 weeks too, and that for it to be that strong is a really good sign.  She then commented on the ultrasound picture (yes, I took the picture in) is really clear and she's suprised that they got such a good one.  :D


We had a student doctor come in first.  She was an idiot.  No, no, I'm being truthful.  She. Was. Dumb.  She couldn't answer any of my questions so I had to ask the attending everything.  And even then I wasn't completely satisfied.  (Who tells a women who's had a history of miscarriages that she can lift weights up to 50lbs and do jumping jacks?)  But anyway.  He said that I shouldn't feel movement yet, because I'm so heavy.  That broke my heart.  He told me it was probably just gas and I was imagining the baby move.  It doesn't make sense that he would say that, because it's how sensative the muscles are, not how fat you are.  I didn't cry there but I cried all night when Greg fell asleep.  I didn't want to look all bloodshot for the pictures that Greg and I were going to take. 

I like how I look.  I mean, yes I'm huge..But I like it.  I don't like some of the comments I recieve.  Mostly if they know for sure that there's just one in there.  There is!  I understand that I'm big.  However you don't have to say that "oh, it looks like twins!"  It's not.  There's only one.  I don't understand why people could be hurtful like that.  Just like any other girl, I've had a lot of self-esteem issues.  And that doesn't go away when you're pregnant.  When I look at myself, I don't see myself as that big.  Yes, it's more than before, but it's not as much as what some might see in the picture. 


Long story short...it hurts when someone comments about your weight.  No matter if you're super skinny, a  big hippo or somewhere in between.  That doesn't go away just because you're expecting. 

I think I look pretty good.  But that might just be me.  I'm enjoying how my belly just seems to point out.  Still bums me out that some are so negative about my weight.  It's none of their business.

So what if I have dark red strech marks?  Although I don't like how they look, they're there for a very beautiful reason. 












Strike that though...I don't really like this picture.  I just want to show, that I'm not ashamed to show 'em off.  Just because I'm fat and my belly hangs a little doesn't mean there's not a baby in there.  (ONE baby)  And proves that strech marks just happen.












This stomach bug that I had, really messed up my whole system.  This might be T.M.I. but I can't go to the bathroom.  It's kind of annoying.  And the antibotics that I had for my "mild" UTI, makes my pee have a sligtly green (I shit you not) color.  "Medicine might change color of urine" ummmm yea!  I still don't have my hunger back 100% yet.  And I still feel sick to my stomach every once in a while.  But thank God it's a lot better now. 


If only I could take a nap.  Like a 20 hour nap.  That would be a-m-a-z-i-n-g. 


Until Next Time:
~MommyToBee