Overachiever?

The time is currently 7:55am and I have already eaten breakfast, folded about 2 loads of laundry and did a general pick up of our room's floor.  Not only that:  but I'm dressed.  And I'm not meaning I threw on a new shirt and I'm still wearing the same old sweat pants that I've been wearing for 4 days straight.  Nope.  I am wearing jeans and a t-shirt.  I. Am. DRESSED.  Why?  I have absolutely no effing idea.  I know that I cleaned up for the landlord coming.  But the whole reason to be dressed completely blows my mind.  Generally, I don't have a reason to be dressed for the day.  I'm kind of excited that I motivated myself enough to do so. 


Well.  Let me first off on saying that I'm sorry for my (lack of) a last post.  The person I was referring to probably still has no clue that I'm completely annoyed with them.  It's kind of hurtful.  I don't want to resent this person, but I don't want to tell them how I feel because I don't want to hurt them.  This year has been very trying for them, and I don't want to complicate matters. 


So I'm going to bottle it up.  Apparently he/she doesn't want to hear what I have to say, even when they ask for my opinion.  So I'm gonna clam up.  They know that they are slowly ruining their lives.  So why should I even let them get me down?


Okay...pregnancy stuff!


I am growing impatient about finding out the sex of the baby.  It's only 10 days away (God willing) and I cannot wait!  Everyday it gets a little more exciting.  I want to know if I need pink stuff or blue stuff!  Gah.  It's like when you're little and you know a big trip is coming up.  That sort of new/exciting feeling in the pit of your stomach that keeps you up at night.  Hrmmm...maybe that feeling in the pit of my stomach is actually the baby doing flips?  Because he/she is doing that now.  Anyway, I'm too excited.  Maybe the tech could also say if I'm a little further than what the doctor's think I am?  I'm still convinced that I'm too huge for 5 months. 


Oh wait...I was huge BEFORE I got pregnant.


I sometimes forget that I'm a hippo.


Now, a little excitement.  I had a little worry attack.  Starting on Monday morning until last night, I didn't feel the baby at all.  Like....at ALL.  I freaked!  Mainly because I felt the baby everyday at least once for almost 2 weeks up at that point.  So I was worried.  I didn't know what was going on.  I tried to conivce myself that it was just in a different place and I couldn't feel it.  Or that I had a sleepy baby during the day and secretly at night the baby was kicking up a storm.  Or maybe what I was feeling for the past 2 weeks it wasn't really the baby...and more like my muscles.  Again, I tried to convince myself.  I made Greg and my Mom go nuts.  But secretly, I was out of my mind.  I can't help it.  My mom had a normal, perfect child (ME!) before she had a miscarriage.  Compared to me, it's a story of once bitten, twice shy.  So I want to be prepared for anything bad that might happen. 'Cause ya know, I'm not COMPLETELY deranged.  After a really hard time trying to convince myself that everything is fine, I finally relaxed


Anyway...last night Greg and I were watching American Idol while we ate.  And at one point, I leaned back and kind of rubbed my belly.  It was one of the performaces and I was zooning out (I don't particularly care for this preformer) and wouldn't you know....the little bugger was DANCING.  You could see my belly push up and down at spots.  Baby boo was going nuts.  I couldn't believe it.  I felt the baby flipping and punching.  The kicks seemed to be coming from everywhere. 


My kid is going to drive me to my grave.  And it might happen in utero if he or she doesn't stop making me worry.


Since the weather is be-u-t-ful I think I'm going to go for more walks in the up coming week.  Might as well, right?  Walking is good for both me and the baby.  And it let's Mommy get out of the house.  The only problem is that I live in the Ghetto.  And there's really no good place around me to walk.  We live in an area of th city that isn't completely terrible...but it's nothing like Newmanstown.  Where you can walk until the streetlights come on, and the only trouble you'll get into is your mom yelling at you for being late.  Here it's crazy drivers that don't watch where they are going.  And young kids who think they are badass.  My phillosophy is that if I don't bother you, don't bother me.  Greg makes me take a knife or something when I go out for walks, but I don't like to do that.  But I do understand that people are messed up and will try anything.


Well I think I'm going to take my overachieving butt for a walk, since the birds sound so pretty.
Until Next Time:
~MommyToBee

Another Week! :D

The past few weeks have been...interesting. Weeks 15 and 16 I had a stomach bug that made me worry about the health of the baby. Week 17, I found it hard to eat and drink water. And now at week 18 is starting off with lots of cravings and hunger. Yesterrday I needed to have pancakes for breakfast. (I had a dream about them. Then I needed to have spaghetti with meat sauce. For desert I needed to have a mixed dish of ice cream from Dairy Queen.

I maintain the fact that it wasn't me who wanted it...it was the baby. And boy, once I ate those three things...I got kicked...alot. In fact, when Greg and I were at Giant to pick up some of the things we needed for the spagetti, I got kicked so hard in the kidney, I almost doubled over. Of course, Greg goes..."The baby can't kick you in the kidney!" And all I could think was: "Oh yea, and you've had a mini human growing inside of you?" I know that the baby didn't really kick my kidney...but it felt like it. And the fact that the kicks are getting stronger is a pretty awesome thing. I had a little issue with not being able to feel them on the inside, but I definately felt them on the outside. That is no longer the case. I'm pretty sure that the little one is doing flips and cartwheels and pretending that my insides are his or her own personal punching bag.


It's pretty awesome though. :) I really am not complaining. I just want him or her to know that it's prefectly find to beat me up. I just beat up Daddy then. :D
So I had a pretty amazing weekend! It started out on Saturday. My best friend, Jenn, came down for a visit. Jenn, her husband, Greg and I went fishing and just had a nice day just fishing and catching up. It was so nice to be around some of my friends. Seems like lately it's been all about Greg and his friends. I know that's not really the case...but it was really nice to see them! I'll have to post the pictures I got from our little fishing trip tomorrow, since I can't seem to find the usb cord. We went fishing...got caught on rocks...lost sinkers and hooks...Jenn was the only one who caught a fishie!...we had dinner...and a little shopping at Greg's favorite store. I actually cried a little when we had to say goodbye. I'm a sap. And pregnancy hormones aren't helping.
I know that it's only less than 2 weeks until I get to see everyone up there. I am so friggen excited. I'm also pretty excited for our gender prediction ultrasound. I really, really, REALLY want to know! Seems like everyone else who is due the month I'm due already found out. I know I'm one of the late ones, but I still want to know! I know in the beginning I was praying it's a boy...but I'm raelly liking the fact that there might be a little girl in there. Either way...I'm going to be happy.


*kicking starts for the first time today*


Well, I guess it's about that time...stoopid laundry.
Until Next Time:
~MommyToBee

"Baby, it was only a dream..."

One of the things I found out is when you're pregnant, you have more dreams/nightmares.  I've always had an active subconscience...but it's a little crazy right now.  Every night I have at least one dream where I'm as big as an apartment complex and Greg is cheating on me.  And he's cheating on me with people I know but I haven't talked to in years.  When I wake up, I am insanely miffed and jealous.  The other night I actually punched him, I was so mad. 
My name is Amanda, and I think I abuse my boyfriend...

Of course, he has never cheated on me.  Nor has he ever cheated on anyone.  But these dreams are so real.  And after more than a few dreams I literally cannot go back to sleep.  All I can do is roll over, hold him and know that he is laying next to me and that he's not going around behind my back.  I have no reason to believe he's cheating, because we're attached at the hip.  And when he has to go to work...he's texting me...almost constantly.  So why am I bugging out?  

Well.  He does have a few friends that are women.  Not a big deal, right?  *buzzer sound*  I loathe the one woman.  Her husband works with Greg but he doesn't talk to her husband.  And she texts Greg...alot.  We've only met once but for some reason, I don't trust her.  But shouldn't I trust my fiancee?  Duh, of course.  I just don't like how she eyed him up.  I feel like a dog that must mark my territory and snap on anyone who tries to go after what's mine. 

The sick thing is?  It's not even women.  Lately he's been helping people out with their cars.  He's real good and working on that kind of stuff.  And he's getting paid for most of it.  But they are taking him away from me.  I'm grateful that he has a real skill (I still think that he should go get his G.E.D and see if anywhere would hire him.) but does he have to do it every Saturday? And sometimes during the week?  He'll get calls saying "Oh are you going to do *blank* for me?"  They honestly expect him to drop everything to do whatever they want.  Every night he gets texts and calls for all sorts of things.  It bugs the hell outta me. 

I already told him I get him, all to myself, a month before the due date and at least two months after the baby is born.  He didn't really like that at first but eventually he agreed.

I'm sure that the reason why I'm feeling so jealous is because I am getting insecure.  I love my baby bump.  But, other things are growing too.  Like my booty, *I had to google booty...cause I didn't remember how to spell it* hips, legs and boobs.  That, and up until about a week ago, I had no sex drive.  So I felt that if I wasn't giving him what he wanted, he would find someone who would.  And that maybe I'm not that interesting.  That's why he always going off and working on peoples' cars.  In  my sick mind, it makes a lot of sense.

I trust Greg.  I really do.  And I have never had these thoughts about him before I got pregnant.  This is a new thing.  I just wish that these nightmares would stop.  I'm losing sleep and losing faith.  It seems so silly, but it's really eating me up inside.

Well, now that I got that out of my system.  I'm sorry for the emo post yesterday.  That is the number one reason why I shouldn't blog when I'm already crying for no reason.  It's been a very bipolar week for me.  Ha, this baby is going to make me even crazier.

Side note:  Everything has been going well.  I *think* I'm feeling the baby move.  It kinda feels like gas.  It's kinda weird.  It's also really cool if it is the baby.  It's just something I got to bring up to the doctor and see if it is the baby or just phantom flutters.

Next post WILL have pictures.  I decied that even though my laptop is dead and my desktop is a pos, I'm going to make it work.  :)

Until later
~MommyToBee